When I first started this blog Arthur said that he wanted nothing to do with it but I asked him anyway what he thought I should title it. He said, the quote from the VW German guy commercial. So that's where we got our title and I was so pleasantly surprised that he was participating!
Every once in a while Arthur checks out other blogs, including the Christopherson's. On Friday he came home and said, "The Christopherson's posts are funny because they always require (ask for) an answer from people who read them. You should post about that. And then, ask people what they wish they had known before they had their first baby". So this post is really a post from Arthur and the purpose is twofold:
1- To make (nice) fun of the Christophersons for making posts that asks their readers for comments, and
2- To do the same thing as them. What are five things you wish you had known before having your first baby? We're so excited to have Astrid in a few months but we also know that it won't all be peachy. (We're interested in responses even if you're not a parent yet).
Monday, September 24, 2007
Arthur is a blogger at heart
Posted by Jasmine at 8:23 AM
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9 comments:
Arthur--we knew you were. You sent us all that legal speak saying you could override this whole blogging thing, and instead you're riding it (slightly obnoxious that I used ride twice, but also kind of fun). I bet you even read this comment all on your own, Jasmine didn't even have to point it out to you. And Jasmine, can't wait to hear people's responses to this post. I will then take all of that good advice, see how it worked for you, and so on.
Not sure why you had to throw us and our blog under the bus to feel better about asking for reader participation, but I'll bite:
1. I wish someone told me that new babies like their moms a lot and sort of don't give a crap about their dads. I had my feelings hurt pretty regularly by my oldest daughter's clear preference for her mom. But it all changed when number 2 was born -- we became fast friends.
2. You'll be so enamored with the novelty of a new baby, you will do both of the following: (a) try to incorporate her into your existing social patters, and (b) never want to leave her with a babysitter. I wish I had forced us to start using babysitters much earlier, because you don't realize until it's almost too late that you could have really used the alone time and you needed practice at the new, somewhat forced version of alone time. You get used to it. And as boring as it sounds, having your kids on a sleeping schedule makes things much easier in the long run, even if it cramps your style at first.
3. This comments is already too long, so I'll end with this: blowouts. Be prepared for blowouts, and plan now for how you're going to deal with them. Call with questions.
I second the blowout preparation. And you can never have too many breast pads on hand. Error on the side of way too many pictures.
my babies don't really have blowouts, but I agree with Jacki about the breastpads. I've been thinking about your blog a lot, this question you have posed. I've never just had one baby at a time, so a lot of the things i immediately think are stuff that probably don't really apply to having one baby, because you can still do a lot of cool stuff with one. (for ex., you can take a newborn to the movies. 2 babies for me is pushing my luck.) Um, one piece of advice my sisters gave me is to remember this: all first time moms just want to hold their baby all the time. which is totally fine. but just remember if you hold your baby all the time, they'll WANT to be held all the time, and you'll have to end up rocking them to sleep for every nap and night. just a thought.
Honestly? Are you ready for this? I don't usually spout off my "wish I'd knowns" but since you're asking...
Actually everyone's experience is SO different that no matter what anyone tells you, there will be some surprises.
But, I'll say a few things.
1. You will still look a little pregnant after giving birth (maybe not for you though Jas). It takes a week or so for it (the belly) to go down.
2. Are you breastfeeding? I assume so since you are Jasmine - the first "latch" on feels funny and then your nipples kind of need to get toughened up which takes about a week. It will probably sting when the baby first latches on for a week or two and then it goes away and nursing becomes one of the coolest things you'll do (again, my personal experience and is that too much info for a blog??)
3. Try to never forget the smell of your newborn. It's heaven.
4. Get witch hazel pads. And then freeze them. They do wonders for afterbirth. Need more details? Email me. If you have a c-section, talk to Samantha...I don't know about that recovery.
5. Personally, next time around I'll be getting some comfortable clothes that I haven't been wearing for the past few months as a pregnant person. You'll want to be comfortable and braless.
6. Get a sling or baby bjorn. After attempting Target once with her in the carseat, I realized how much more of a hassle it was to carry a carseat around. Slings are the way to go (again, personal opinion, but it made my life much easier).
7. You can never have too many pictures. They change daily, if not hourly.
8. I second the "schedule" advice that it is actually easier when the baby has her naps, but in the beginning there is no schedule. They sleep and eat when they want and you're just there for the ride and to keep up. I hated hearing "sleep when the baby sleeps" but look at me now, I'm saying just that. A newborn has really crazy (late night) sleeping patterns and you're going to be tired.
9. Is your mom coming out? Because nothing, nothing beats a good meal that you didn't have to make. Mmmm.
10. I'd suggest taking the first bath WITH her. Avery cried in her first bath and all I wanted to do was jump in there. Second one went much better.
11. You really don't need much "gear." Everyone has their opinions about this one though. 12. Once you feel up to it, start getting outside. Trip to the farmer's market, around the block, to the bagel shop. Fresh air just makes you feel good. Again, I suggest wearing her...
Oh my gosh. I'm at 12?? I'll stop. It sounds so cliche to say "enjoy every second" but it's true. Your life changes overnight. No matter of pregnancy prepared me for what changed after giving birth. A piece of you leaves when you give birth and it is the coolest, most surreal feeling. It's a different type of love than anything else you have experienced. When she cries you'll feel it. And when she laughs, you'll feel it again. And again and again and again with everything else she does. It's incredible. And so much fun. I'm so happy for you guys.
PS: #13? The mom thing. It's true, newborns just need their moms. Maybe just prepare Arthur for that. Is he reading this? But, that changes too. It's always changing. Probably why it's so much fun.
And wait, when are you due?
Ok, I said "braless" but your nursing breasts will necessitate some sort of "bra" with breast pads (third that advice!). Get nursing bras (and comfortable ones) before your milk comes in (yep, I actually forgot about getting those). I was alone after Ave's birth...it didn't take long for me to make a Target trip for those.
Oh and if you have problems with clogged milk ducts, take Lecithin. Clears them up in no time!
I'm done. For real.
Philip is also a closet blogger. Advice..
1. you won't know how- but you will emerge after six weeks (and this is important- Aurthur, Jasmine gets a free ride for six weeks- whatever she needs while she's adjusting, she gets. whether it is to cry, to be irrational at you, sleep in, call her mother or any one of us at 3:00 am) as a beautiful,triamphant and confindent mother, don't ask us how.
2. You will learn to fear the sound of pooping more than crying.
3. You will still love your husband the most.
4.On Nursing: It is wonderful! Nurse as long and as often as you want. That being said. If you can't, it is OK- my sister in law's milk never came in and she felt guilty for too long. Have a nursing pillow. You will go through as many outfits as your child when you first start nursing. Lansinoh Breast Pads are the only brand to buy- they are more expensive but I once went through an entire gerber box in one hour. Give it 6 weeks. You will not want to wear clothes (true story: my friend's husband took all these pictures of their newborn without realizing his wife was topless in the background) Your breasts might shrink after you're finished, they might not change, or they'll leave you, in my case, a triple D. Cruel world.
5. Trust yourself. If it doesn't feel right don't do it. If it works for you and Arthur don't feel like you need to defend yourselves to anyone.
I would write more, but Vera just pooped through both her pants and mine. Love you!
Wow! I didn't think we'd get such a plethora of advice! This is awesome. I'm jealous that all of you are mothers/fathers already! Reading your advice makes me so exicted and I'm happy to know about the low points also (that way I know what's coming to us).
What I wish I knew before having my first baby:
1. The names of all the presidents in order.
2. How to move things with my mind so I could clean up while laying down.
3. Where jacki signed my name that resulted in free baby formula about every other day in the mail.
4. What patagonia looks like in person, in the morning, when the sun is rising.
5. How to cook.
yup. once i master those, i'll be having a baby.
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